new name?

researchers figured out that my first name is unsexy and associated with a bad social environment. parents which were led by popular foreign-language songs or films in their choice of baby names are supposed to belong to the uneducated underclass. in my case it was an english song. the professor said that my first name (together with Cindy, Kevin, ...) is ok for a hairdresser but lawyers, designers, doctors or other academics will have a hard furrow to plough with this name. i am broken. please help! i won't get a prestigious job in the near future. and who's to blame? my name? absurd.